Foto sekadar hiasan. Hide profile sya admin..Saya isteri umur 44 thn .. ade 3 org anak …bln 8 thn lpas sye diisythiarkan ade knser payud4ra tahap 4 .. hidup saya sejak tu masuk kluar hspital je la.. payudara sblh kanan dah kena buang.. chem0 dah 16 kitaran .. baru keluar hspital je ni .. skarang knser dah merebak smpai paru paru.. dr bg balik dgn 0xygen dan ub4t thn skit..
Sya tahu masa sya dah xlame.. spanjang duduk dlm w4d .. sya dh nampak dah biasanya knser tahap sya ni plg kuat bleh tahan smpai raya ni je..
sya dan kluarga pun dah sign perjanjian utk tdak selamatkan saya ( tak buat cpr atau masuk tiub dlm mulut sya) jika keadaan sya smakin tenat dgn dr hspital.
Sejak sya kluar dr hspital, sya perasan yg husband slalu hlang waktu mlm.. sya xtahu brp lama dah jd mcmni mungkin sejak dr sya duduk di hspital lg sbb waktu tu yg jaga saya di w4d anak perempuan kami ..
lpas 2 minggu kt rumah dan perhati perangai dia .. saya cakap kt dia .. kalau dia nak kawen lain saya bagi dan benarkan ..
cuma jgn kawen waktu saya hidup saja … dan saya nak tahu juga perempuan mana yg dia kacau tu… dia x marah dan x nafikan apa apa..
mungkin dia nampak keadaan saya dah uzvr kot, mungkin dia kesian utk bergduh dgn saya..
2 hari lps saya curi tengok kejap phone dia waktu dia masuk tandas.. betapa h4ncurnya hati saya jmpa msg ni.. saya cuba kol nombor tu tp x berangkat..
saya gna simcard anak saya kol baru la berjawab..Terkejut saya bla sya dengar suara yg mnjawab tu suara adik perempuan saya sndiri..
yg boleh komfemkan lg yg dia adik saya bila saya dgr background suara mak saya berleter kt blkg.. saya trus letak phone tu.. saya terkedu xleh ckp apa2..
adik saya janda muda baru umur 28 .. model tudung lg .. mstila org berkenan .. tp knapa yg berkenan tu msti suami saya.
Kalau saya ser4ng suami dgn adik… maruah keluarga sya h4ncur, maruah suami saya dpan anak anak pun habis h4ncur…
saya mungkin dah xlama atas dunia ni.. kalau saya diam .. smua org selamat .. anak saya xkan tahu perangai ayah mereka macamana ..
saya rasa mcm nak minta kat Tuhan m4tikan saya sekarang. Saya xmahu susah siapa siapa..Saya dah sedia untuk pergi..
Saya nak tanya klau tuan puan duduk di tmpt sya .. tuan puan buat macamana.
KISAH KE 2.Assalamualaikum, terima kasih admin sekiranya confession ni tersiar. Aku nak share pasal cara nak tahu pas4ngan yang cur4ng.
Ciri- ciri ni aku banyak baca dekat internet dan setepek sama dengan ciri- ciri yang ada pada suami aku masa beliau terjebak 2 tahun lepas dalam kecur4ngan ni. Cerita dah lama, tapi biasalah kadang-kadang teringat balik.
1) Perwatakan berubah.
Bila si dia tengah cur4ng atau bakal cur4ng, perwatakan mesti berubah. Sama ada dari tiba tiba jenis baik je, boleh jadi kuat marah mar4h (marah benda yang nonsense, tak masuk akal)
Seolah olah dia sengaja nak cari punca nak gduh (dalam kata lain, nak cari alasan esok esok dia buleh bagi reason kata kita punca nya).
Atau pun, dari beliau jenis yang biasa biasa macam no feeling kinda person tetiba jadi terlebih romantic. key word kat sini: TIBA TIBA ye.
Handphone pun dari elok je kita boleh guna sama-sama, tapi this time setiap kali aku pegang phone, beliau mesti mengintai2 tengok apa kita tengok.
Bila beliau macam tu of course la kita lagi curious kan. Siapa suruh tak pandai cover line.. muahaha..
2) Kuat menipu.
Agak agak la, nak menipu isteri memang tak dapat la. Isteri ni ada deria instinct (bukan buruk sangka ya) yang Allah dah kurniakan.Suami menipu confirm isteri dah boleh hidu. Cuma antara nak suarakan atau tak je.
Lagi satu, orang yang menipu ni, bila kita tanya soalan dekat dia, dia bagi jawapan yang seolah olah repeat balik soalan kita dan dengan nada yang defensive.
Contoh aku pernah tanya beliau dulu “Awak cur4ng ngan saya ke?” Si dia, “Awak rasa saya cur4ng??” Something like that.
3) Do everything extra.
Ada setengah orang, dia tk suka melawa, atau malas sangat nak bersiap cecantik. So kalau dia TIBA TIBA bersiap lawa dan hari hari pulak tu.
Hmm, why eh? Tapi, bila aku baca point ni kat internet, aku susah nak detect part ni dekat suami aku sebab beliau memang jenis suka bersiap.
Beliau skit, nak pergi hspital pun siap pakai pomade dengan perfume. Aku yang tukang bawak ke hspital yang bersiap biasa2 ni pulak yang macam orang skit. haha.
Tapi aku dapat detect jugak sebab dia “EXTRA” bersiap. Contoh pagi tu dia iron baju (time ni dia tak bagi aku iron dah sebab katanya aku iron tak betul.
dan dan je, padahal sebelum ni elok je aku yang duk iron), dah iron baju tapi tak pakai baju tu. dia pakai t-shirt. Dah sampai tempat kerja baru dia pakai beb. Tau tak sebab apa.
Sebab nak jaga sangat2 penampilan supaya baju tak kedut depan that girl . Yela kalau bersiap dari rumah, tara nak keluar rumah ngan anak lagi, duduk dalam kereta driving kan berkedut dah la baju tu. hehe…
Part extra ni banyak. Lagi satu, tetiba je jadi gh4irah semacam. Dalam kereta nak c1um lelebih. Ye la dah kahwin boleh je nak buat gitu tapi agak-agak la kan depan office aku kot.
Padahal memang tak pernah buat pun sebelum ni macam tu. Texting pun tiba tiba kerap pulak text, jadi sweet tak tentu pasal, beli banyak hadiah tiba tiba. Banyak lah. Semua ni nak cover lah aktiviti dia disebalik kita.
4) Kerap balik lambat.
Part ni sangat yes sebab aku banyak kali dah tak sedap hati bila beliau balik lambat. Katanya banyak kerja nak siapkan.
Ada project bla bla bla (you know the drill) Tapi masa ni aku cuba tepiskan semua rasa dan percaya yang beliau memang ada banyak kerja.
But who knows “kerja” dia tu ialah pergi hantar that girl balik kerja, lepaking dengan member2 tempat kerja together with that girl. Hahaha. Padahal aku kat rumah dengan anak tengah tunggu dia balik.
Sedih masa ni sebab masa ni bulan puasa dan aku takder transport, terpaksa duduk rumah mertua sampai 12am- 1am tunggu dia balik.
Buka puasa dengan family beliau tapi beliau takda. Busy berbuka dengan orang lain. Aku pasrah la masa tu sebab beliau kan cakap beliau banyak kerja.
Kadang tertidur dekat ruang tamu dengan baju kerja, dengan bertudung (sebab beliau ada adik lelaki and abang belum kahwin) .
Bila beliau sampai rumah mak, selamba je c1um kepala and ajak balik rumah. Macam orang bod0h je aku.
5) Handphone.
Ya.. handphone ni sangat la membantu. Tiba-tiba tukar password (or ltiba2 baru letak password). Nama that girl suami aku tak letak nama lelaki whatsoever, dan beliau tk bl0ck pun that girl.
So aku percaya bila beliau cakap yang that girl tu kawan beliau. Yela salah aku lagi sebab bodoh tak percaya walaupun dah rasa tak sedap hati, dan banyak kali Allah nak tunjuk tapi aku masih percayakan beliau.
6) Instinct.
As a woman, instinct is the most crucial.. Lelaki pun boleh ada rasa ni rasanya bila ada something wrong tak kena dengan pas4ngan kita.
Aku dah banyak kali rasa something is really off tapi aku menidakkan sebab aku takda bukti.
Until one day, aku main phone suami. Aku bukak dekat Chrome, nak type something.
Suami aku jenis yang suka delete hist0ry tau (dari sebelum cur4ng), perangai beliau memang gitu sebab beliau tk nak phone hang katanya.
Masa aku main phone tu, aku bukak chrome nak search something. Then tergerak hati nak tengok history (walaupun aku rasa beliau mesti dah delete semua) – then tiba2 je ada type search no dekat whatsapp guna browser. Aku cam no tu. Dia tak clear history. And number tu is number that girl.
Aku pun tanyalah, “apa benda ni” Terus beliau marah2 padahal sebelum tu elok je duk main dengan anak, baru balik dinner.
Aku terus call that girl guna phone beliau masa beliau keluar bilik. Tk dijawab. Aku salin no. Beliau terus keluar rumah lepas tu.
Dan aku pun tak buang masa dan terus call that girl. Sebelum ni banyak sangat hesitation ye lah sebab aku pun tk nak b0d00h2 pergi ser4ng orang tak tentu pasal. Aku bukan macam tu.
Tapi this time, aku dah tak nak bagi alasan untuk diri sendiri, I just needed to know the truth.
Maka terungkai lah semua. That girl memang honest tak tau suami aku dah kahwin dan ada anak.
Suami aku cakap beliau duduk sendiri sorang2. Hmm sampai hati. That girl hantar semua screenshot whatsapp suami aku dengan dia (aku mintak dia screenshot).
Ada yang masa suami aku text tu suami aku baru lepas hantar aku ke kerja, ada yang time kami tengah dekat mall sama2.
It was k1lling me to see all those words coming out from him to another girl that is not me. But I had to know everything. I met that girl sometime after that.
Dia minta maaf. Dia tertipu dan aku juga ditipu. Kawan2 tempat kerja suami of course tau beliau dah kahwin tapi takda sorang pun nak bagitau that girl. Memang aku pelik dengan manusia zaman sekarang.
Itu sajalah. Aku nak cakap sikit, baik lelaki atau perempuan, kalau ada apa yang tak kena dengan pas4ngan, jujur sahaja depan2.
Tak perlu nak jadikan itu sebagai alasan. Macam aku, sejujurnya aku open minded bab poligami.
Tapi bila aku tanya suami nak kahwin ke dengan that girl, kalau nak kahwin aku izinkan. Beliau jawab tak nak pulak dah. Beliau kata beliau takda apa rasa pun dekat that girl.
Ruginya, buat semua ni sampai r0sakkan hubungan dengan isteri yang sah tapi takda perasaan dekat that girl pun.
2-3 minggu aku kemurungan, makan roti sebagai alas perut je hari2 (sebab perlu jugak tenaga nak jaga anak), 6 bulan aku simpan jauh2 cincin kahwin kami sampai lah aku redha dan maafkan beliau.
Aku maafkan sebab aku realise semua orang ada time akan buat salah, dan mostly I did it for myself. I needed to move on. I needed to live my life, not stuck at the moment. And the rest is between him and Allah.
Saja aku kongsikan tips tips ni. Bukan boleh prevent pas4ngan korang dari cur4ng pun cuma at least you are prepared for what’s coming. Hehehe..
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