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Aku tunaikn hajat suami lps mlm pertama, tersenyum lebar dia tp mak mertua dtg sound suami aku

by fairuz
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Foto sekadar hiasan. Baca perlahan-lahan, semoga dapat pengajaran dari kisah ini. Assalamualaikum dan selamat sejahtera kepada semua pembaca. Sebenarnya luahan aku ni biasa je dalam kalangan masyarakat dalam dunia ni. Tapi aku nak cerita jugak supaya bagi orang sedar the reality of life. Aku Ain (bukan nama sebenar) umur baru 27 tahun dan dah 2 tahun kahwin. And aku jugak degree students dekat UM , grad tahun 2012.

Dan pernah kerja di Petronas MTBE Gebeng, Kuantan selama 2 tahun masa bujang as a secretary. So lepas aku kahwin aku decide nak berhenti kerja and ikut suami aku balik Gombak sebab dia and family org Gombak.

Paragraf 2

Bos aku tak bagi sbb dia cakap skrg peluang kerja payah. Besides, beliau suruh bakal suami aku waktu tu jadi weekend husband macam dia.

Tapi aku bertekad berhenti jugak. Sebab bagi aku apa guna kahwin kalau duduk jauh. Kedudukan isteri paling baik adalah di samping suami. Aku fikir kerja tu biarlah. Lepas kahwin nnt aku pun boleh cari.

Kalau kerja jauh jauh pun sampai bila. Satu hari nnt still kena berhenti jugak sbb takkan suami aku kena kerja Kuantan pulak.

So kami kahwin dan aku officially jadi surirumah. Mulanya mak bapak mertua aku ada sound suami aku. “Tak nak ke suruh Ain tu kerja?” “Tak susah ke kamu kerja sorang?” “Cukup ke duit belanja kamu hari hari?” “Ada degree sayang la x guna” and so onnn.

Yes, Old people mindset. Jawapan suami aku mudah je. “Biarlah dia taknak kerja. Rezeki Allah tu tetap ada. Bukannya tak elok dia tak kerja.” (Huuuu i love you huband).

Semua suami aku cerita lepas tu sbb dia taknak aku dengar. Masa tu rasa bersal4h tuhan saja yg tahu.

Rasa mcm time tu jugak aku nk pegi update resume mintak keje mana2. Haha. Tp suami aku bijak. Pandai pujuk hati aku yg sedih. Mak aku sendiri pun bising aku tak kerja.

Aku tahu niat dia baik. Dia taknak anak dia ni menyusahkan orang. Asyik makan hak orang je. Tapi aku ckp kat mak aku, aku mmg takde hati nak kerja. Aku suka duduk rumah dan jd isteri yg baik. So what can they say.

Tapi masalah org sekeliling lah. Sepupu sepapat, kawan, aunty india sebelah rumah, tukang cuci toilet, masyarakat pribumi, ahli jkkk kampung, baik belah aku dan suami sama je semua. Sibuk sangat dok kondemn aku jd housewife degree.

Siap berubah riak muka lagi. Serius aku tersentap dan terasa hati. Aku tak terfikir jd mcm ni masa nk berenti kerja dulu. Apa hina sangat ke aku tak kerja? Teruk sangat ke wanita sekarang duduk rumah aje?

Come on lah. Allah tak marah pun kau jadi housewife. Tu kerja mulia. Lepas tu n sampai la sekarang ni mak ayah mentua and mak aku takde dah nak mempersoalkan aku yg x kerja. Sebabnya sekarang aku jd tailor. Duduk rumah ada tempahan org jahit baju so aku jahit.

Yes dari aku belajar kt UM lg aku dh pandai menjahit. Tapi aku la pulak, tengok kawan2 dlm FB semua berkerjaya ada jugak rasa iri hati.

Tapi seriously, bila dapat tengok wajah suami aku balik kerja n aku pulak dapat sambut dia, dia pun hari2 x pernah lupa pelok aku, pastu tengok makanan dah siap atas meja habis hiilang perasaan iri hati tu.

Ye betul tu semua kerja ibliis setann la nk bg kita sedih, dengki bagai. Suami aku pulak paling aku tabik dalam dunia ni. Dia lagi la. Pegawai kerajaan. kawan keliling pinggang dok tanya wife kerja apa. And dia konfidennya jawab aku housewife.

Aku ada tanya dia tak menyesal ke kahwin dgn housewife. Dia cakap tak. Bagi dia buat apa kerja dgn gaji ciput, pastu kerja tah apa2. Ulang alik kerja jauh pulak.

Pegi siang balik malam pastu kerja rumah terbengkalai. Dunia sekarang bukan macam dulu.

Hectic lain macam. Dia taknak macam tu. Aku salute dia. Dia hormat keputusan aku n at the same time dia tahu apa yg dia nak. And paling penting aku dengan suami sampai sekarang makan pakai cukup.

Dia siap boleh belanja aku beli jubah jubah mahal. Yelaaa Gaji org keje gomen gred 41 berapa la sangat dgn cengkaman kos sara diri sekarang.

Aku tahu dalam hati dia pun mesti susah hati aku tak kerja. Susah hati aku dok sorang kt rumah. Cuma dia je yg x cakap.

Anak pun takde lg nak buat teman. Suami cakap hari ke hari aku jd makin x suka keluar rumah. Aku pun sedar. Kawan2 masa uni pun aku tak contact.

Aku jd anti-sosial. Yes tu adalah kesan jd housewife ye. Pada korang yg sukakan kehidupan yg hectic, sibuk, mencabar penuh onak duri; housewife job is not for you. Kawan aku suami je. Ke hulu ke hilir dia je aku ada. Aku ada mintak kerja. Tp belum ada rezeki.

Tp aku x kesah pun kalau x dapat sebab bagi aku serve suami lagi penting dari segalanya. Tu syurga aku lepas Allah.

So moral of the story, nak cakap dekat semua, memang tak semua benda yg kita rancang kita akan dapat. Kun fayakun. Aku lepaskan career aku tapi aku dapat suami yg MasyaAllah sangat baik dan supportive.

Kami cuma bergantung pada rezeki Allah. Sebab tula aku rasa kewangan kami yela ada masa2 dia kering jugak. Tp most of the time rezeki kami tak pernah sempit.

aku dulu ada impian nak kerja lagi best sbb yela kerja petronas gaji sedap. Berangan nak up lg kerja lain. Tup tup lain jadinya bila kahwin. Tapi takdir Allah tetapkan, sapa la kita nak tolak. Semuanya bersebab.

So org luar tolong la jangan tanya kenapa kawan korang ada degree tp jd housewife. Benda tu menyedihkan. And sensetif. Kalau dengar ckp housewife please sokong cakap benda baik2.

Suami cakap kawan dia berlambak wife dorang yg kerja best2 belajar tinggi2 pun akhirnya pilih jadi housewife jugak. Apa apa pun, majulah housewife untuk masa depan rumah tangga yang bahagia. Sekian.

Kisah ke 2 lebih mendebarkan, baca perkongsian di bawah

Assalamualaikum.. Saya pernah menjadi suri rumah.. beza umur anak selang 2 tahun seorang.. dari segi luaran saya memang nampak ok. Tapi saya sebenarnya tak ok.

Bagi saya, menjadi suri rumah ialah pilihan sendiri.. sebab saya nak jaga anak dengan tangan sendiri. Suami pun tak memaksa saya bekerja.. Sepanjang menjadi suri rumah alhamdulillah rezeki kami cukup..

Kami tak perlu hantar anak pada pengasuh, kami tak perlu membeli susu formula sebab saya menyusu sepenuhnya kedua2 anak, kereta satu saja jadi komitmen tak tinggi, saya terima dan makan apa adanya dan tak merungut.

Cuma sepanjang menjadi suri rumah.. saya mengalami d3pr3ssion. Kenapa? sedangkan saya sendiri yang mahu menjadi suri rumah dan gembira dengan pilihan sendiri.

Pengalaman saya, saya pernah terdengar suara untuk mengelar tangan sendiri, saya pernah menangis tanpa sebab, saya pernah fikir nak campak anak, saya murung dan lupa apa hobi saya, saya tak berminat nak makan walaupun sebelumnya saya sangat suka masak dan makan..

Saya sukar nak tidur malam.. saya macam kehiilangan diri sendiri.. saya rasa diri tak berguna.. dan banyak lagi keadaan yang menyebabkan saya rasa mahu saja m4ti.

Saya pernah jumpa doktor, tapi doktor tu lelaki dan dia tak tahu apa masalah saya.. dia menganggap saya mengalami masalah rumahtangga bila saya cuma menangis depan dia..

Dan dia bagi saja ubat tidur bila saya minta tanpa cuba fahami masalah saya.. lagilah saya rasa putus harap sebab dia tak cuba bantu saya.

Setelah saya fikir kembali, antara sebab saya kemurungan ialah sikap suami yang suka mengkritik. Suami saya baik, tapi dia tak faham tugas seorang suri rumah yang sangat memenatkan..

Saya buat segala2 nya dari mengurus anak, pergi pasar, memasak, basuh baju, jemur baju, lipat baju, gosok baju kerjanya, kemas rumah, urus anak yang clingy.

Bila dia balik rumah kena dalam keadaan kemas sebab suami serabut tengok rumah bersepah. Tapi apa yang mahu diharapkan dari dua anak yang baru berusia 3 tahun dan setahun..

Saya ke pasar membawa kedua2 nya, balik rumah dalam keadaan penat terus memasak tengahari sebab suami balik makan tengahari, sebelum balik rumah mesti berkemas tapi agak mustahillah dengan dua anak kecil.. saya bukan robot mampu buat semuanya.

Apa jadi kalau dia balik rumah bersepah? suami akan kata saya ni tak pandai mengemas, malas, atau pun dia diam saja tapi saya tahu dia tak puas hati dengan pandangan matanya..

Lepas masak saya dah penat mahu mengemas dapur, tapi kalau saya biarkan tentulah dia akan kata saya ni pengotor dan pemalas,

 

Lepas makan dia akan pergi kerja balik, dan sayalah kemaskan semuanya.. balik petang rumah kena kemas lagi.. anak kecil biar setengah jam pun dah bersepah takkanlah saya nak kena kemas sepanjang hari.. saya tahu penat juga, dengan menyusu lagi.

 

Saya masak setiap hari tanpa gagal.. untuk suami dan anak2.. sebab saya rasa memang tanggungjawab saya..

 

Lagipun saya mahu tolongkan jimat belanja rumah, memang banyak dapat jimat kalau masak sendiri.. tapi suami jarang hargai, kadang dia komplen lagi ayam saya tak masak, atau kari saya tak menjadi, atau dia buat muka..

 

Saya rasa sangat tak dihargai selepas saya berhempas pulas siapkan makanan dengan dua anak kecil, saya rasa diri tak berguna sedangkan orang lain selain suami selalu puji masakan saya.. ini suami sendiri asyik condemn saya, saya jadi down.

 

Bila perkara ini berlarutan, ia seperti menyebabkan saya hiilang keyakinan diri.. saya dulu seorang yang bersemangat, hobi saya memasak dan saya memang suka cuba resepi baru.. tapi bila asyik dikritik dan tak dihargai, saya jadi begitu rendah diri, rasa tak berguna dan jadi down sangat.

 

Bertahun keadaan berlarutan, suami pula sangat sibuk dan jarang bawa saya berjalan.. bukan saya tak pernah minta,

 

Saya cuba berterus terang yang saya perluukan masa untuk bergembira atau tukar angin, memandangkan saya 24 jam seminggu hanya duduk dalam rumah dengan anak kecil, saya rasa mntal jadi block dan tepu, tapi suami tak faham sangat..

 

Dan jaranglah nak bawak saya makan angin.. saya bukan minta pergi hotel mahal, sekadar bawa pergi makan di kedai atau ke pantai, saya akan rasa lebih tenang.. tapi saya jarang dapat keaadan tu.. hujung minggu suami sibuk dengan urusan lain pulak.

 

Saya rasa mntal saya breakdown sangat.. banyak kali cuba saya beritahu suami, saya hantar mesej panjang2, saya luahkan apa ada dalam hati saya, tapi sekadar tu sajalah.. tiada respon..

 

Saya tak tahu suami faham tak.. saya tag tentang komunikasi suami isteri di fb, pun dia tak ada respon.. saya jadi tawar hati.

 

Saya rasa hubungan kami hubungan yang toksik.. sebab hanya saya saja cuba berkomunikasi tapi suami tak cuba faham saya..

 

Saya jadi pendam perasaaan sendiri.. saya rasa lmas yang amat.. bertahun2 berlarutan, saya rasa hak saya dinafikan.. lalu saya minta crai.. saya tak mahu tertekan lagi..

Saya dah cerita yang saya d3pr3ss pada suami, tapi dia hanya dengar saja, kadang dia salahkan saya sebab mengaji sikit, banyak lalai, jadi banyak syaitan ganggu.. dia masih tak faham..

Jadi lama2 saya meletuplah.. bukan sekali berkali2 juga.. sebab saya tak tahan dah dengan kritikan, asyik condemn kerja yang saya buat.

Dia selalu kata orang lain ok je jadi surirumah takde nak stress macam saya, nenek zaman dulu anak lagi ramai tapi boleh handle anak2 dan rumah dan siap layan suami tip top, saya dengar rasa sangat tertekan jiwa..

Mana lagi saya nak luahkan perasaan saya ni? rasa tak berguna nak luah kepenatan saya sebab dia akan kata dia lagi penat pergi kerja, saya rasa nak menangis sebab dia tak faham langsung suri rumah ni sangat memenatkan..

Kalau saya mengadu penat, memang hanya buat saya makan hati saja sebab dia bukan nak dengar.. sedangkan saya hanya nak meluah saja..

Dia tak tunjukkan simpatinya, tiada pluukan nak menenangkan saya, kadang2 dia tidur atas sofa di luar, saya tidur dengan anak2 sebab masih menyusu..

Saya cuma mahu dia beri perhatian

lebih pada saya, urut kaki ataupun cukup dengan berterima kasih pada saya sebab menyiapkan semuanya untuk dia.. tapi itu jarang2 berlaku..

Saya kehiilangan kasih sayang.. yang saya harapkan dari seorang suami.. tapi dia hanya mengkritik bukan sampai naik tangan. Tapi masih jugak perasaan saya terdera.

Kemuncaknya bila dia biarkan saya pendam perasaan seorang diri, saya nak bincang dia asyik kata dia sibuk, saya bercakap pun dia hanya diam tak ada response, saya minta crai lagi.. saya tahu saya berdosa tapi dia tak faham skitnya mntal saya diperlakukan begitu..

Saya pernah ajak jumpa kaunseling keluarga, tapi dia kata dia sibuk.. masa tu kami gduh, dan akhirnya keluarga besar kami tahu.. mereka tahu kami bergduh, tapi hanya luaran saja tapi mereka tetap tak tahu puncanya apa.

Saya juga dipersalahkan kerana minta crai.. ya tuan2, saya tetap bersalah sebab suami saya innocent sangat, dia baik dan sempurna cuma orang tak tahu apa yang saya alami..

Kalaulah dia boleh kawal lidahnya dari menyalahkan saya dalam semua perkara, dan banyakkan memuji dan menghargai saya, tentulah saya tak akan pergi sejauh ini.

Saya dah pendam bertahun2, mntal saya ditorture tanpa dia sendiri sedari, sampai tahap saya dengar suara2 tu, saya rasa putus asa sangat..

Suami saya baik, dan saya sangat sayangkan dia, cuma saya yakin dia tak faham dan akan selamanya tak akan faham bahawa surirumah ini sangat berat sekali kerjanya.

Sekarang saya ambik keputusan untuk bekerja.. ya anak saya dah besar sedikit dan saya mula bekerja.. alhamdulillah, environmentnya sangat berbeza.. saya keluar dari rumah dan cari kebahagiaan saya..

Oh ye kami tak bercrai pun.. cuma saya tukar keadaan hidup saya.. saya banyakkan cari bahagia saya sendiri..

Kalau suami sibuk, saya pergi sendiri ke mall bawa anak2.. saya pergi makan sendiri, saya bawa anak berjalan di taman sendiri.. saya bawa anak pergi berkelah di taman tanpa suami..

Saya dah tak peduli lagi apa kata suami.. yang penting mntal saya sihat.. saya rindu nak berjalan2 dengan suami tapi kalau dia sibuk saya akan pergi sendiri.. saya tahu untuk bahagia kita kena usaha sendiri.. dan tentulah air mata saya kini hanya berlinangan masa solat..

Kalau sedih sangat menangislah meraung2 macam budak kecil masa solat malam.. saya cari cinta lain dari cinta suami.. saya doa semoga Allah bagi cintaNya supaya saya tak lagi mengharap cinta suami. Cinta manusia ni susah sangat nak dijangka.. saya tak mahu berharap lagi.

Kesimpulannya, menjadi suri rumah sangat sukar, bukan setakat kerja2 nya yang sukar, tapi apabila orang paling dekat dengan kita sendiri pun tak memahami, ianya menjadi sangat2 sukar.. tiada sokongan, tiada empati, tiada simpati..

kita berjuang sendiri, tidak difahami dan tidak dikasihani.. itulah agaknya punca ramai suri rumah stress melampau.

Nasihat saya, para suami yang ada isteri si suri rumah, fahamilah, kasihanilah, hargailah, cintailah isteri sepenuhnya..

Bagi sokongan, bagi isteri rehat, banyakkan bertanya, jadilah pendengar yang baik.. bawa isteri berjalan2, dengar luahannya, bagi hadiah dan surprise, gembirakan hatinya.. jangan mengkritik, jangan compare dengan orang lain,

Jangan banyak komplen tapi berlapang dadalah.. duduk di rumah nampak mudah saja, tapi belum tentu semua orang mampu..

Isteri bukan robot, mampu buat segalanya tanpa rehat.. banyakkan bertolak ansur dan menolong isteri supaya mntalnya sentiasa dalam tahap yang baik.

Kepada rakan suri rumah, saya tahu ia sangat sukar.. belum termasuk kewangan yang membebankan, pandangan sinis orang luar, rehat yang tak pernah cukup.. tapi bertahanlah..

Ada balasan baik menanti insyaAllah.. minta Allah permudahkan jalannya.. semoga sentiasa tenang dan baik2 saja.. kita mahu jadi isteri yang gembira, dan ibu yang bahagia, kan? Bahagia perlu dicari, ketenangan perlu

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